Relationship in a higher level

I've been in a relationship for years now...and it's only just now that I realized how deeply I got involved in it....I am in a way happy..but I have fears....now that I completely committed myself to it, now I realized all the possibilities....now I am beginning to feel so depensive of my being...that my parents' raised me well, that whatever choices I made in my life it's my own personal decision and I'm the only one to be blamed...That I am once a good girl and this choice that I made is the only blemish in my being....now I'm one of those that I used to observe...now I'm one of those who decided to live with a wrong decision in exchange of pleasures that only heart can recognize....but i don't regret what I did...I am just beginning to accept the new me.....the me that my love ones never knew exists....I guess it's really saying goodbye to the old me..including my values.....but I swear not to be that different to my old me....I will always try to maintain and set my limitations....and try to be extra careful....I mean I pray for God's guidance... I know how I disappointed him...I know he did so many things so that I can always maintain the old me...it was me really....